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November 6, 2012

Why wait? A single girl’s view on sex


This is a guest post by Glo Girl Angie Gillikin.


A magazine on my coffee table has a headline that reads: “Guys Reveal: The Sex I’ll Never Forget.”  It’s all too common for women to be touted with how to have great sex compared to why you’re not having great sex, but no one ever talks about what happens when you do have sex.

Yes, sex was designed to be great. You might need to perfect it a bit, but good should naturally become great by design – just like anything else in life:  practice makes perfect.

So what pains me the most is how society has equated sex to being desirable.  If you’re not having sex, you must not be desirable.  But what about the ones who have chosen to wait until marriage for sex?  The negative connotation of a “virgin” label is almost enough to make you go for it just to say you’ve done it, even if it is only once and even if it becomes one of your greatest regrets.

But the truth is that sex has never saved a dating relationship. I’ve often been told, “I wish I would have waited” by now-married women, because they don’t have anything new to discover physically and sexually in their relationship upon marriage.

So, why wait?  God designed sex to be within the confines of marriage.  A guy who will wait is one who ultimately respects your body, your heart and the deepest part of your soul.  He believes in fighting for you, and he communicates with you with his words instead of assuming you know his feelings based on his actions in the bedroom.  He finds ways to romance you without sex.  And above all, he respects you.

So, my question is not, “Why wait?” My question is, “Why not wait?”


Angie Gillikin is a single 30-something Texas girl continuously learning to live day by day, trying to live each day to the fullest! Angie is involved in numerous community and charitable activities as well as her church where she’s been a youth, college and singles Bible Study teacher. She loves Rodeo, Dr Pepper, big jewelry, cowboy boots, reading, jogging, crafting, road trips and small towns. In her spare time she writes on her personal blog and spends as much time as possible with her besties and family including The Littles—her nephew and twin nieces. For more about Angie, visit her on Twitter.

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  1. Judith Ann Lambert says

    November 6, 2012 at 4:24 pm

    Thank you Angie. I am nearly 70 and have been divorced since 1995. Last month I would have been married 51 years. Some day my prince will come. However when He does He will a King. God truly gives the best.

    Reply
  2. John Morgan says

    November 20, 2012 at 3:18 pm

    “A guy who will wait is ultimately one who respects your body . . .” That, in itself, highlights one of the main problems within the Christian single community today. Girls are willing to settle for a guy who “will wait” with them instead of waiting on God to bring them a guy who “is waiting.” There’s a big difference. But your views echo the current social climate. Mirriam-Webster has even taken men out of the definition of “virginity.” That certainly doesn’t make virtuous men feel too “desirable” does it? Yes, there are very few Christian single women who can even think about a man without thinking about “actions in the bedroom.” That is unfortunate. A virtuous guy’s mind doesn’t even go there. Hearing things like that is precisely why you don’t see many of us in singles Bible studies. Outside of marriage, how are virtuous men rewarded? Do we get a flower on Father’s Day? No. Instead, we are put down and made to feel unwelcome. Something to think about.
    John – 51 yr old

    Reply

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